6.6.07

Caution: Watch at your own risk

Anyone who reads my blog on a regular basis will know that I like trashy cheese as much as the next man (probably a bit more actually). So it's not often that I discover an act which pushes even my boundaries of good taste. But I think I've found it finally, in the shape of Danish bubblegum popstars, Toy Box. Toy Box appear to have taken up the baton of dragging pop down to its lowest ebb from fellow countrymen Aqua. And they've done a pretty good job. The lead vocalists are Anila and Amir. They're pretty much as scary as the pair in Aqua, with less redeeming features. And the music? It's so cheesy, even I feel dirty when I listen to it. Let's check them out for a moment.

The Sailor-Song
All the nice boys like a sailor, and there are plenty of them here. All of them arm-in-arm singing a dirty old sea shanty aboout seamen and life on the ocean waves, while the ship carrying them fires its mighty funnels. It's hard to believe that the song itself could be any camper. But check the lyrics, 'If we all come together, we know what to do, we all come together just for you'. And if that wasn't enough hedonism for you, check out 'Sailing, sailing, jumping out the railing. Drinking, drinking, 'til the ship is sinking. Gambling, stealing, lots of sex-appealing'. Sounds like the average Channel crossing on SeaFrance to me. And who on earth put the words 'That's not a knife... THIS is a knife' into a pop record? 'Girls like me are pretty hard to find' she sings, dressed in a mere slip of a bikini. Not in my experience, darling, just try hanging around Soho on a Friday night.




Tarzan and Jane
Every cheesy group has their Doctor Jones moment. And here are Toy Box at it in the jungle. Their intentions are quite plain when the lyrics begin 'I am Jane and I like to ride an elephant'. Full use is made of the opportunity to dress up in sleazy loin cloths and dance suggestively. But nothing will prepare you for the sight of what Tarzan starts pumping away at when the video hits 02:20 (45 seconds from the end). Looks like he's using something he bought from Prowler to me.




Best Friend
I've saved the best for last. Best Friend is like a cheesy pop version of the film Fatal Attraction. The video appears to be based around the theme of a jealous girl who has some kind of a psychotic crush on her best friend. So much so, she appears with her leather clad girls' gang rehearsing karate moves learnt directly from the Karate Kid. Things turn more violent when she gets tooled up with a pair of scissors and cuts her best friend's girlfriend's hair to shreds. She takes out another one with a large incendiary device and two more with a crossbow. No wonder juvenile violence is on the rise.





Labels: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

14 Comments:

At 12:28 pm, Blogger AcerBen said...

Toy-Box were fahking awesome.

I remember Smash Hits started a campaign to get "Tarzan & Jane" released in the UK, but the label ended up releasing "Best Friend" first so they could tie in the release with the Disney Tarzan movie. But then BF only got to #41 so they didn't bother. Shame because it was always on The Box!

The Sailor Song is a bit sick if you really think about it...

 
At 12:29 pm, Blogger AcerBen said...

Also check out "Superstar" from their second album !

http://popunlimited.blogspot.com

 
At 2:47 pm, Blogger Rachel said...

My God,are they real?!I have a Europop obsession so I'm used to naff lyrics, but "Tarzan is handsome,Tarzan is strong,he's very cute and his hair is long" is in a whole new dimension of naffness!I particularly like that bit on the boat song at the end where the girl says "This was great." Is life really that bad in Denmark?!

 
At 4:51 pm, Blogger londonboy79 said...

I agree with all the above, but I won't hear a word against Toy Box. Bringing europop to a new low is worthy of our admiration!

 
At 6:25 pm, Blogger Robpop said...

DSTP got so much schtick when this band featured on the blog! WOAAAAAAAAAH! Great band and of course from Denmark so can't really go wrong there!

 
At 8:51 pm, Blogger Schlagerboys said...

Oh. My. God.

Toybox were just sooooo completely fabulous!

The 90s were just the Europop years!! Bring back Europop!!

And of course Denmark knows how to do Europop - wasn't Whigfield Danish??

 
At 11:40 pm, Blogger Me. said...

Can't beat a bit of cheese!

 
At 4:28 pm, Blogger Jake said...

Makes Aqua and Mr.President seem like Coldplay! Thanks for posting these.

 
At 10:01 am, Blogger Lai Weizhou said...

chung cư Imperial Plaza 360 Giải Phóng
chung cư Imperial Plaza
chung cu Imperial Plaza
Imperial Plaza 360 Giải Phóng
chung cư The Legend 109 Nguyễn Tuân

 
At 9:11 am, Blogger ninest123 said...

ninest123 16.01
gucci outlet, tiffany and co, ugg boots, michael kors outlet, ugg boots, ugg boots, longchamp, louis vuitton, nike outlet, michael kors outlet, ray ban sunglasses, burberry, nike free, polo ralph lauren outlet, christian louboutin outlet, replica watches, louis vuitton outlet, louboutin, oakley sunglasses, prada outlet, michael kors outlet, louis vuitton, oakley sunglasses, michael kors outlet, nike air max, longchamp outlet, ugg boots, burberry outlet online, ray ban sunglasses, tory burch outlet, louboutin shoes, tiffany jewelry, michael kors, chanel handbags, longchamp outlet, jordan shoes, polo ralph lauren outlet, prada handbags, ray ban sunglasses, replica watches, louboutin outlet, oakley sunglasses, uggs on sale, louis vuitton outlet, nike air max, louis vuitton, michael kors outlet, cheap oakley sunglasses, oakley sunglasses

 
At 9:12 am, Blogger ninest123 said...

timberland, oakley pas cher, north face, michael kors, vanessa bruno, converse pas cher, ray ban uk, true religion outlet, tn pas cher, michael kors, mulberry, nike air max, ralph lauren pas cher, burberry, nike free, nike roshe run, hollister pas cher, ray ban pas cher, true religion jeans, air jordan pas cher, vans pas cher, nike air max, lacoste pas cher, lululemon, coach purses, nike free run uk, michael kors, abercrombie and fitch, nike huarache, hollister, nike blazer, hermes, nike roshe, replica handbags, louboutin pas cher, nike trainers, air max, hogan, air force, coach outlet, longchamp pas cher, nike air max, true religion jeans, true religion jeans, sac longchamp, north face, michael kors, new balance pas cher, ralph lauren uk, sac guess, longchamp

 
At 9:15 am, Blogger ninest123 said...

s5 cases, converse, ralph lauren, hollister, louboutin, ferragamo shoes, abercrombie and fitch, soccer shoes, iphone 6 plus cases, babyliss, nfl jerseys, soccer jerseys, instyler, north face outlet, iphone cases, birkin bag, iphone 5s cases, hollister, oakley, nike roshe, nike air max, mcm handbags, north face outlet, iphone 6s plus cases, vans, wedding dresses, valentino shoes, giuseppe zanotti, insanity workout, mac cosmetics, reebok shoes, timberland boots, iphone 6s cases, new balance, ipad cases, herve leger, ray ban, p90x workout, baseball bats, celine handbags, ghd, mont blanc, beats by dre, jimmy choo shoes, gucci, nike air max, vans shoes, asics running shoes, bottega veneta, iphone 6 cases, chi flat iron, lululemon

 
At 9:19 am, Blogger ninest123 said...

juicy couture outlet, moncler, moncler, pandora charms, supra shoes, links of london, canada goose outlet, ugg,ugg australia,ugg italia, moncler, canada goose, doudoune canada goose, montre pas cher, hollister, marc jacobs, lancel, ugg,uggs,uggs canada, louis vuitton, barbour jackets, moncler, doke gabbana outlet, converse outlet, wedding dresses, louis vuitton, karen millen, ugg boots uk, canada goose, moncler, toms shoes, swarovski crystal, bottes ugg, pandora jewelry, pandora jewelry, canada goose uk, coach outlet, thomas sabo, canada goose, moncler outlet, sac louis vuitton pas cher, moncler, ugg pas cher, swarovski, louis vuitton, louis vuitton, replica watches, pandora charms, moncler, canada goose outlet, barbour, canada goose, juicy couture outlet
ninest123 16.01

 
At 4:11 am, Blogger Lai Weizhou said...

chung cư Imperial Plaza 360 Giải Phóng
chung cư Imperial Plaza
chung cu Imperial Plaza
Imperial Plaza 360 Giải Phóng
chung cư the legend
chung cư the legend 109 nguyễn tuân
chung cư eco green city

chung cư eco green city nguyễn xiển

The manor central park nguyễn xiển
chung cư udic riverside 122 vĩnh tuy
chung cư Valencia garden
chung cu Valencia garden
chung cư Valencia garden Long biên
chung cư HBI Long Biên
chung cư vinata tower
chung cư vinata tower 289 khuất duy tiến
chung cu vinata tower
chung cu vinata tower 289 khuat duy tien
chung cư 289 khuất duy tiến
chung cu 289 khuat duy tien
chung cu 82 nguyen tuan
chung cư 82 nguyễn tuân
chung cư 69 vũ trọng phụng
chung cu 69 vu trong phung
bất động sản miền bắc
chung cư hà nội

chung cư eco green nguyễn xiển
eco green city
chung cu eco green city
chung cu eco green city nguyen xien

 

Post a Comment

<< Home